Category Archives: chickens

Christians are Considered ‘Icky’ to HOAs?

Christmas. What a wonderful holiday. I love it as much as I love Hanukkah and the Seder and all the other religious holidays. In fact, I love any religious person’s special days. It’s just what we do in America.

But why, oh why, are Homeowners Associations coming down so hard on holiday lights? I get it that some light displays are over the top. I get it that gorgeous light displays bring more traffic into a neighborhood. But the greater spirit I see during the holidays satisfies an inner part of my soul. Homeowners Associations, as far as I know, are the only entity in America where expressing your religious beliefs is verboten.

A Reward For Turning In A Rotten Neighbor

Just amazing! Just in time for Christmas, counties in Florida are offering rewards for turning in criminals. Just look around your HOA and you can find plenty of board members and property managers who are stealing, bribing, defrauding and embezzling from homeowners. There’s your Christmas money.

Just take this advice from a long-time investigative reporter. Whenever the cops ask you to anonymously call an 800 number, the dirty secret is that you’re not anonymous. The Crimestoppers 800 number is a complete and total scam. Call from a phone booth.

(turn in Florida criminals for a reward)

Thank You For Stupid People!

On this Thanksgiving, I am thankful for stupid people. Without them I wouldn’t have much material to share with you on this website.

Some HOA Nazis in Altamonte Springs, Florida called the cops and told them there was an illegal mahjong game being played in the Escondido Community Condo Association clubhouse. Well, the vice cops hit the doors, busted up the illegal game and arrested the criminals, all ladies between the ages of 87 and 95.

Ya gotta love those HOA Nazis.

(link to CBS Tampa story about these old lady criminals)

 

Texas Clock Boy is Back, For All The Wrong Reasons

Well, I’m no longer a fan of the so-called ‘Ahmed, the Clock Kid.’ He’s the Texas 14-year-old who assembled a clock and thought it was cool enough to show his science teacher. In our no-tolerance world a kid can’t even point his finger and say “bang, bang” without the police being called. When the cops started interrogating Ahmed about whether the clock was a bomb, it became a viral sensation. He was solicited by colleges, got an invitation to the White House.

When I’m Wrong, I’ll Admit it

Rumors are that the mastermind of the 60 million dollar Las Vegas HOA scam has reported for his federal prison sentence. I’ve long predicted that Leon Benzer would never, ever report to federal prison. He knows how to get in and out of Mexico. He once owned a tequila company there. With a 15 1/2 year prison sentence would he not be tempted to cross the border?

I’m still not giving up my suspicion that Benzer will retire to a Mexican beach. He’ll only serve half his prison time, anyway, so maybe he actually will show up. And the white collar criminals I’ve known have absolutely loved their time in prison. They’re worshiped as heroes behind bars. Of course, Benzer knows that. But we’ll see.