Tag Archives: Federal investigators

Backyard Chicken Wars

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So strange to think that a whole movement would begin around the subject of backyard chickens. In our American frontier, no one would give a second thought to a hen or two laying eggs for the family. But things have changed. Chickens are about as welcome in most neighborhoods as ticks on a picnic blanket.

Still, there really is a movement to convince city councils everywhere that chickens in the backyard can actually be a good thing. In fact, another small town in Colorado has just approved it.

Another strange thing is that chickens are often more frequently welcomed in city, not rural neighborhoods! They keep down pests, they supply eggs, and if there are no roosters around there’s not much noise. (Funny how it’s always the men who are life’s troublemakers!)

Ah! Don’t even think about chickens in the backyard if you live in a Homeowners Association. No, the neighborhood lawn Nazis want your lawn fertilized with strong chemicals, not natural things like chicken manure.

http://tinyurl.com/lyalg9q

Bahama Mama! OUCH!

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There probably isn’t a tourist in history who’s visited a resort in Mexico or the Bahamas and hasn’t been approached by a hyped up HOA salesman. You can buy a condo in La Paz, or an apartment in a proposed new resort in the Bahamas for pennies on the dollar. It sure is tempting with all that warm sun and salty air.

But beware! As bad as American HOAs are, they don’t compare to the problems you face when investing your money in another country.

Homeowners and developers are at odds in the construction of Oceania Heights, a ‘luxury’ vacation paradise in the Bahamas. A Bahamian attorney and a Canadian zillionaire are behind the project. The operable phrase is the ‘troubled’ project. It’s at a standstill with hundreds of thousands of dollars being bled out of property owners for legal fees, and what-zit fees, and whatever other money has to be passed back and forth under-the-table.

Hundreds of vacationers threw their money at the proposed resort homes. But Oceania Heights just can’t seem to get itself built.

If you think HOAs in America are plagued with problems, wait until you’re dealing with an HOA in a third world country.

Why, oh why, oh why?

http://tinyurl.com/mkxbk2t

 

Killing the Deal!

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Ah, Bunky.

So you’ve finally gotten that wonderful new job in another city and you’ve gotta put your condo on the market. Well, get ready for some bad news. The boards of Homeowners Associations just love killing real estate transactions. And they’ve got lots ways to do it.

An article in Marketleader.com talks about a few of the ways a Homeowners Association can kill your deal to sell your home to a prospective buyer.

If your HOA has a history of filing liens and lawsuits against homeowners, you might as well donate your property to a charity. You’ll never sell it. And  a mortgage company will never let your buyer make the purchase.

If your HOA has any kind of legal history (think Trayvon Martin) then your contract with the new buyer is probably dead.

If there’s any history of discrimination or construction defect litigation, then you may as well kiss your home equity bye-bye.

The mortgage companies are getting wise.

Ladies and Gentlemen: Behold the monster you have created!

http://tinyurl.com/mhlvtc4

 

Outlaw Gardens!

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It’s amazing to read the hundreds of stories about neighbors who’ve been fined, sued, liened or foreclosed for the simple crime of planting some vegetables somewhere around the house. HOAs hate any kind of plant that’s edible. And planting a cucumber or other veggie can actually end up costing you your house. Welcome to HOA Amerika!

So it’s kind of fun to see that there really is a growing movement called Outlaw Gardens. How to have a vegetable garden without the local lawn Nazi knowing about it.

I’ll link to one of the sites below, but please understand that this isn’t a be-all end-all solution for you. Some of these lawn Nazis are so intrusive that you still can get busted. And remember that most HOAs have approve of any and all of your landscaping changes. So have fun. But just be cautious!

http://tinyurl.com/m6mmfy8

 

Are You A Sinner?

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That was just hypothetical. According to some religions we are ALL sinners. But what gives a Homeowners Association the right to determine who is a sinner and who is not?

I know, you think I’m just exaggerating again. But my regular readers know I NEVER resort to hyperbole, right?

Well, Bunky, take a look at the latest outrage in a Venice, Florida Homeowners Association. The Casa Di Amici Condo Association refuses to allow a condo sale to anybody it deems (in its own infinite wisdom) to be ‘living in sin.’ Now, if, as the Bible teaches, we are all sinners and no one is capable of judging one another, what in Hell is going on here?

Major life decisions, i.e., investing all your money in a home, is now up to a board of directors who take a vote on whether a prospective buyer is a sinner? Is there a point system? Would my war-widowed mother be deemed a sinner because she married again?  Would I be excluded because I was the second child of my widowed mother? Would a rape victim who chose not to abort a child be rated higher or lower on the Casa Di Amici Condo Association’s ‘sin scale’?

Give me a frickin’ break!

Losers, all of them. If I had their neighborhood address list I would publish it!

http://tinyurl.com/lju9hbt