Yes, welcome to your new condo. You’re going to love living here. The neighbors all get along and we don’t seem to suffer the kinds of problems felt in many other Homeowners Associations. You’re buying into a little bit of Heaven, your own private home. Welcome, welcome, welcome!
Oh, we’re sorry we couldn’t give you copies of the covenants, the budget and insurance papers in time for your real estate closing. At the time you requested them, the paperwork was tied up in some minor snafu. But it’ll all get worked out soon.
Ah yes, and ignore the story in the newspapers today. Those crooked reporters always make up their facts and get the story wrong. Everybody knows how warped and dishonest the media are. Just sit back and enjoy your new life!
(link to the neighborhood Welcome Wagon!)